The high profile divorce case involving former Kerala
forest minister KB Ganesh Kumar and his wife Yamini Thankachy has been the main
story of all televisions channels and newspapers in Kerala in March, and first
week of April, 2013. The dramatic reporting was enjoyed by the public and for
the political rivals of Ganesh it was an unexpected weapon to finish him. But lost
in the din and bustle of the mudslinging is a painful truth. One more powerful Hindu
Nair family in South Kerala is going to disintegrate.
Ganesh’s is not an isolated case in Kerala. More and more
families are breaking up for reasons ranging from petty ones to serious ones.
Available statistics prove that Hindus, especially Nairs bear the brunt. Kerala
has the highest divorce rate in the country according to a recent report in
Deccan Chronicle. A report
appeared in the paper points out that 38, 231 divorce cases filed across 18
family courts in the state last year. Hindu majority southern districts are far
ahead of Muslim dominated Northern districts in divorce rate and among Southern
districts Thiruvananthapuram and Kollam with a significant number of Nairs top.
In fact 10, 243 divorce cases were filed in Thiruvananthapuram and Kollam in
2012 which is 33 per cent of the total divorce cases in Kerala.
Failure of NSS in inculcating family values
It is almost clear that Nair dominated areas
are witnessing a spree of divorces and Nair organizations including NSS have
failed to do anything to inculcate values in Nair families and cement ties.
While Christians have the powerful church to mediate in family issues, NSS as a
social organization has failed to do anything to build character among Nair
youth. Divorce rate among Muslims is on the lower side in Kerala as solid faith
in Islam and tightly knit society gives little room for disruptive elements to
destroy families.
Let us compare example of issues faced by
Ganesh Kumar, Kunhalikkutty, P.J Kurien and PJ Joseph powerful leaders who had
faced similar adultery allegations. While the allegation broke up the family of
Ganesh, Kunhalikkutty, Kurien and Joseph saved themselves with the support of
their family. I am not supporting adultery, but is divorce the only solution
when a couple face trouble. Many times allegation of adultery is being raised
to facilitate quick divorce. Shouldn’t a person be given chance to reform? What
about the rights of children whose parents undergo divorce?
Among celebrity couples in Nair community
actresses Urvashi, Kalpana and Kalaranjini have divorced or going through
divorce proceedings. In Thiruvananthapuram town among Nair upper middle class
families according to reliable sources divorce rate is over 50 per cent which
is shocking.
All these point to the fact that a social
dispute settling mechanism is absent among Nairs in Kerala while active among
Christian and Muslim communities. Nair couples going for divorce for silly
issues forget the fact that it is not two individuals alone who suffer from
divorce. Whole families involving aged in laws, children brothers and sisters
and even friends will have to share the impact of their decision. Marriage is a
divine bond and family is a divine institution to help humanity progress.
Absence of religious education among Nairs
While Sunday schools teach Christian children
Christian values, Madrasas teach Muslim children values in Islam. For Hindus,
especially Nairs there are no institutions to teach the importance of values to
children. This leaves Nair children vulnerable to ideological brainwash by
political parties and so called progressive and secular groups which try to
destroy Hindu society by making use of existing laws selectively. These groups
convince youth that respecting elders, helping each other in family in times of
crisis are all unwanted obscurantist ideas. Youth who imbibe this culture
slowly separates themselves from family and many cannot identify even their
relatives. They have no faith in anything and will quarrel among themselves.
Often in divorcing couples in Hindu families,
family is a place where they can express all their frustration without getting
retaliation. They fail to realize that after divorce they will be more
vulnerable to outside attack when they will have none else for support.
