Thursday, April 19, 2012

Nairs and intercaste marriages

What happens when Nairs make intercaste marriage?

Kerala society has undergone tremendous change in the last 25 years and inter caste and inter religious marriage are as much realities in current Kerala society as arranged marriages. Now it is foolish to think for Nairs to stop intercaste/interreligious marriages. But a strategy to cope up with the situation when your son/daughter is going to marriage his/her love from another caste/religion is very much essential.

It will help you to face the reality and if possible continue to maintain relationship with them. When a nair girl/boy marries from another religion or caste, especially lower caste, the nair partner of the couple slowly loses his/her identity completely. Thus when intercaste marriages increases, number of nairs is likely to decrease in future and nair tradition may eclipse.

In this case Nairs should definitely look at the example of how minorities face such situation. Normally, they agree to such marriages on one condition. The partner from other religion should convert to their religion. This way they ensures that their culture is preserved and their numbers are on the rise.

The foolish orthodox sections among Nair community goes by the example of how Namboothiri community in Kerala faced such situation in the past. Namboothiris ousted their grils who even touched males from other communities. Thus Namboothiri community declined. In fact, Nairs themselves benefitted from that practise earlier. Those children born to nair ladies from Namboothiri husbands became Nairs and this contriubted to increase in number of Nairs and spreading of Nair culture in the past.

Modern day orthodox Nairs would be amazed to know that Mannath Padmanabhan once thought of converting others to Nairs. In his autobiography he wrote once he announced it in a public meeting while wondering himself as who would be interested. But to his amazement a Namboothiri came forward and said he wanted to become a nair. Somehow or other conversion programme did not continue.

But present Nairs should demand that those who want to marry their sons/daughters take membership in NSS and declare themselves as Nairs. NSS should give membership to all those who are willing to be known as Nairs. I am sure converted Nairs should work for the interests of Nair community better than somebody is born as Nair and he is ashemed to declare his caste in public and thinks that his acts should be called progressive.

A community can grow only by accepting others to its fold. By others I mean those who approve the culture of Nair community and takes pride in it. What Nairs should do is to convince all those who are intelligent and cultured to convert themselves as Nairs. Thus the best people in the society should come to Nair fold. Thus Nair community would grow without violence or harming any others.

Instead of thinking locally Nairs should think globally. Cultured people from other countries should be made aware of the glorious history of Nairs who were always tolerant and industrious. Thus Nair community should grow beyond the boundarires of Kerala and India.

58 comments:

  1. Can a Ezhava girl get nss membership after marrying a nair boy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't worry about NSS membership. If the boy loves you marry him and lead a wonderful life as a Hindu Nair

      Delete
    2. Wow thats the reply everyone wishes. Dont care about membership and moreover there is nothing better or good having a nss membership..on thr other side you will even lose your existing reservations.. I myself is a nair and to be frank till now there is no good that happend being a nair..

      Delete
    3. Hi, Let me introduce myself. I personally don't associate with any caste, but my father has a Panicker surname and he associates himself with Ezhava. I never had a caste certificate to prove my caste nor do I need as such.

      Now the Nair community has always seemed very attractive to me. I like how gracefully they organize their ceremonies and their interests in various art forms. Some of the Nairs have inherited certain racial characteristics like fair skin and sharp facial features. Thanks to media people in India who worship white western people, fair skin and other features are standards of beauty today. Unlike some castes, the Nairs usually don't booze around creating a ruckus.

      However, my appreciation ends here. If we look at history of humanity, we may realize that religion and caste were very recent practices, that were incorporated to have an organized and peaceful society. As there were no professional colleges like today, the various skills like performing sacred religious rituals, warfare, various metal smithing, business, medicine, etc. were passed on from one generation to the next. There was no need for a hierarchy even then. Today, one can be born in any caste, but they can chose the skill they want to learn and get trained in a college for that. It seems ridiculous that we Hindus are still carrying this useless baggage now.

      Many Nairs are strict about mixing or marrying their children within their caste only. However, can this guarantee a very happy life? Instead they should look for cultured people, regardless of their caste, for relationships.

      Delete
  2. Sir,
    I am an SC boy pursuing MBBS.I am in a relationship with a beautiful Nair girl,who is also studying MBBS.Her parents will never approve of our marriage.How should I proceed? I am willing to change my caste to marry her. But is that the only option? I am doubtful her parents will acknowledge me even after I change my caste.Should we just do register marriage? I respect the Nair Community and our children will be Nairs.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. U can convert from one religion to another but u can't convert ur caste from whatever ur to Nair/Brahmin/ezhava.. am really wonder how a mbbs student don't this basic varna about Hinduism.

      Delete
    2. Dear Vishnu, If you are in sincere love with a Nair girl there is nothing wrong in marrying her if she agrees. I appreciate your integrity in revealing your identity as a scheduled caste member and willingness to become a Nair. If you adopt the title Nair no force in this world can prevent it. I am also happy that you agree to bring up your children as Nairs. Real Nairs are those who are brave and kind in life and are educated and talented. I welcome you to our group

      Delete
    3. Dear Unknown, Please throw away your outdated thoughts on caste and Varna. Are you a brahmin? Nairs are a proud progressive Hindus and we accept others to our fold provided they accept our culture. We grow by accepting brilliant minds from all groups and making them our own.

      Delete
    4. Is there anyone who know the caste or even relegion of the one created this beautiful world and us all?.......is there any caste of relegion for him?

      Delete
  3. What is the need of cast? Think about it man?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Nair community should not accept non-nairs from outside and accord them nair ship.We should kick out those nair who marry outside our community.I am stating this because nair girls are now being targeted for conversion by islamic jihadists in Kerala.In my district,now rich OBCs are targeting our girls.

    ReplyDelete
  5. We should not accept non-Nairs into our community.Those who marry non-Nairs should be ostracised.In Palakkad, I have seen cases where Ezhavas are ostracising those who marry outside their caste.
    We have to realise that the ultimate aim of islamic jihadists such as popular front and certain powerful OBCs in Kerala is to ensure destruction of our community which is neither savarna or avarna.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hy one question sir.
      A pulaya boy can marriage A ezhava girl?.
      Will her parents accept this?
      Pls give me reply 🙏

      Delete
    2. Yes no one should encourage jihadists please because of them Hinduism is getting abolished and vanishing

      Delete
  6. Ha ha unity among Nair's? It can only happen when most of us can lay down our bloated ego.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Let us work for unity rather than being a pessimist

      Delete
  7. Dear Vishnu, If you are in sincere love with a Nair girl there is nothing wrong in marrying her if she agrees. I appreciate your integrity in revealing your identity as a scheduled caste member and willingness to become a Nair. If you adopt the title Nair no force in this world can prevent it. I am also happy that you agree to bring up your children as Nairs. Real Nairs are those who are brave and kind in life and are educated and talented. I welcome you to our group

    ReplyDelete
  8. i have a doubt, a nair boy can marry to varma,thampi other samantha kshetriya cast?the nss recommented its kind of marriage,isn't?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thampy is already Nair. Remember P Madhavan Thampy was Thiruvananthapuram taluk union president of NSS All the samanthas (Kshatriyas) in Kerala were actually Nairs. They underwent a ceremony called Hiranyagarbha to become Kshatriya as Namboothiris insisted it. Kings had to be consecrated by Namboothirirs. But also remember that Zamorin did not use the title Varma They were origninally Eradi Nairs When they became kings they used the title Raja

      Delete
  9. Im hindhu thattan (viswakarma ) i want to marry a Nair girl.but there is some issues in her home .intecaste marriage issues ..there is any way to change my caste into Nair

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If both of you are in love with each other I don't think anybody can prevent your marriage. But first check if you are in real love. If you use the title Nair nobody can prevent you.I appreciate your willingness to become a Nair. Show this blog to your love also. Best wishes

      Delete
  10. I married a hindu ezhava girl. Can I change my wife to my caste ,means to nair.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please add the title Nair to your wife's name. Nobody can oppose it. Use the title Nair with the name of your children. Unfortunately NSS is not giving membership to non-nairs often. But you can contact other organisations like Samastha Nair Samajam. Your wife is Nair assert it. This blog supports her right to become Nair

      Delete
    2. I am a thiyaa and i am going to marry a nair girl...i wont change my caste and our children's caste to nair...lets see what you can do

      Delete
  11. what unni told is right.Especially rich OBC are targetting nair girls due to our loose orthodoxity.See namboothiries.their customs are still preserved.Intercaste marriages are very less among them.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I have the opinion of Mr.Unni.What he says is absolutely right.Rich OBC people are now targetting nair girls.I know so many examples.If we are not ready to preserve our identity it will be dangerous.Namboothiries are still alive with their orthodoxity.They seldom go to intercast marriages.Marriage is not only union between boy and girl but also two family members and have some community impact.I am absolutely against intercast marriages.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I don't dismiss the possibility of Nair girls getting targeted. But the blame for it should be on Nair parents who don't give their children proper religious and moral education and make them proud of their heritage. Those children who often fall in the trap are offspring of parents who go after pseudo secularism and brand themselves as progressive. If we bring up our children in the proper way, it is less likely to be misguided. But I would also like to add that there is no need to oppose intelligent and good Hindu boys marrying Nair girls if they convert as Nairs. Why can't we accept them to our hold. This is the way all communities in the world grow. What you said about Namboothiris is wrong. Namboothiris who constituted around 20 per cent of Kerala population in the historic past is now less than 0.5 per cent of Kerala population. They made girls who married from other castes outcaste and now total no. of Namboothiris in Kerala may be less than fifty thousand. It is likely that they may disappear from Kerala in the next 100 yrs Nairs should not repeat that fooly.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I am a Nair girl..I am in love with an ezhava boy..but my parents oppose it heavily. Moving for a register marriage makes me totally removed from my family..what solution is possible??

    ReplyDelete
  15. As a nair and a member of NSS am deeply concerned about the alarming increase in the number of nair girls being targetted by christians. As someone mentioned above the situation where nair girls being targetted by other caste hindu isn't really an issue as they continue to live as nairs or atleast as hindus. But the cases of nair girls falling into relationship with christian boys and getting converted to christianity is very much increasing at an alarming rate. There where even undisclosed reports of the church instructing their youth to target hindu girls. And mostly rich and pretty girls are being eyed. Our organisational set up is too weak to handle these.

    ReplyDelete
  16. As a nair and a member of NSS am deeply concerned about the alarming increase in the number of nair girls being targetted by christians. As someone mentioned above the situation where nair girls being targetted by other caste hindu isn't really an issue as they continue to live as nairs or atleast as hindus. But the cases of nair girls falling into relationship with christian boys and getting converted to christianity is very much increasing at an alarming rate. There where even undisclosed reports of the church instructing their youth to target hindu girls. And mostly rich and pretty girls are being eyed. Our organisational set up is too weak to handle these.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Conversion & NSS membership should not considered as a parameter of love and commitment. The suggested way would just ensure division and rise in fanaticism. Remaining what an individual was born as or he/she must convert should remain an individual & personal discretion.

    ReplyDelete
  18. How can a non-nair boy become a nair , is it really possible . If so how ?

    ReplyDelete
  19. Can a non Nair boy convert to a nair ..!! Is it really possible.if so how?

    ReplyDelete
  20. Folks, please travel to pre historic era. There you can't see nair,ezhava, kshatriya and nampoothiris . There you can only able to see HOMO SAPIENS or HUMAN BEINGS. They married, have food each other with any restrictions. Then why now. Now HUMAN mind is updating day by day, but on this case his mind isn't working. We all are linked with each other. We are from that old great couples.

    ReplyDelete
  21. hii..am a hindu brahmin frm kerala...n sincerly in love wid a nair girl......i want to know....wot would be caste of our childern ???

    ReplyDelete
  22. I am belonging to nair community and my husband from ezhava.we want our children should belonging to nair.is it possible to choose mothers caste?

    ReplyDelete
  23. I am belonging to nair community and my husband from ezhava.we want our children should belonging to nair.is it possible to choose mothers caste?

    ReplyDelete
  24. Sir, i am in love with my girl(ezhava) and we are not planning to change our caste. We want be like now how its going on. Whether it may be a major issue in our environment or society when i am living with her?

    ReplyDelete
  25. Can a christian boy can marry a Nair girl in both Nair traditions and Christian traditions. What are the ways for that?

    ReplyDelete
  26. Hi,

    One of my friend SC (Pulaya) Friend she married to Nair boy almost 4 years now. they are well settled in Germany. Still his family is not completetly accepted it.But they are ok . Now the boy trying to get her in his community because the wife pregnant now. he need to growup their childern in Nair Community.If it Possible or not. What is procedure for become a Nair Family.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I am a christian,and I am in love with a nair girl.it started in 2008 and still waiting for her parents approval on the same,which not gonna happen.am 30 now and shez 28.we don't ve a plan to elope since we know the value of family,parents and the social status.Is there any way to get married with her parents consent or will us be the new generation moidheen n kanjanamala.I don't want her to get converted and want my kids follow the religion they like. Killer ideas welcome 😊

    ReplyDelete
  28. I am an MBBS doctor from schedule caste and I am in love with a a Nair girl who is a pharmacist. Her family is completely against our relation. We didn't want to leave each other. I tried convincing her parents but they are struck with the case and religion. The girl is so close to he parents that she doesn't want to leave than normal me but is suffering between us. I have no contacts or support which can talk to her parents and convince them. Are there any ways to reach our to her family and combine hem. I am ready to convert to Hindu and join NSS if they accept

    ReplyDelete
  29. Sir iam ezhava iam marriegeNair girl .we got any benefits of intercast marriage in panchayath

    ReplyDelete
  30. According to ruel can A Nair boy is able to Marry Velutedhathu Nair girl?

    ReplyDelete
  31. I am a nair boy (degree student) and from last 2 years am in relat.n with a vishwakarma(carpenter) girl. We are in same age. Can u help me... I mean...how should i marry her...with my parents permission...

    Please Reply.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Hello people! Do you know some examples of intercaste marriages in India? My parents don't allow me to marry because of that :(

    ReplyDelete
  33. i belong to a Christian community ....i love a nair girl ...for her my religion is the problem ......so i planned to change the religion...and became a nair...already my mother belong to nair community......what are the procedures i need to follow to change my community ....and my name also needed to be changed ah....?....i do all sort of things for her....just tell me what to do...

    ReplyDelete
  34. Sir
    I am nair...I loves a girl who is in vishwakarma...Is their any prblm is going to happen in our future life? We are not willing to change our cast...

    ReplyDelete
  35. Hey all.....actually what is the use of this caste? Is there any caste or even relegion for us at the time god gave us a birtha?

    ReplyDelete
  36. Is there a caste or even a relegion for the one who created this beautiful world and us all? Do anyone have the answer for this?........

    ReplyDelete
  37. I am a tamil saiva pillai girl. Is there any problem if I marry a nair boy even if we both belong to the forward caste? Is this marriage socially acceptable in nair community?

    ReplyDelete
  38. Sir, my mother s hindu nair and father is hindu ezhava.. And in my school cirtifictes and all my caste is ezhava, and i want to change my cast is hindu nair, what ill i do for this, and where ill i want to applay for this

    ReplyDelete
  39. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  40. I am a north indian..and i am in a relationship with a nair woman..and we have decided to get married..but as usual her family does not support this..and i am not ready to convert in nair..bcz i dont belelieve in caste's..i my self is from gujjar(caste) from haryana..but what can be the other option to..make her parents orthodox thinking stop about these things.even if i do not marry this girl..but these are the things which divides people in india.

    ReplyDelete
  41. I'm from Ezhava and I love Nair girl,her family will not accept this.Is possible to change my caste Ezhava to Nair ?

    ReplyDelete
  42. I am a muslim boy..i loves a nair girl....her family doesn't allow to marry a muslim boy....can i change my caste to nair??

    ReplyDelete

The Fall Of CPM And Its Transformation As An Elitist Group

  From 43 MPs in Lok Sabha in 2004, CPM members in Lok Sabha has come down to just 3. Politically t he party doesn't have any significan...